As I was saying to a dear friend today, craigslist is like the sketchy-looking 50 cent bin at the rummage sale – most of what you’ll find is crap; but if you dig long enough, you’ll unearth a gem.

On Sunday morning, I woke up a bit later than usual, bored and maddeningly turned-on . My Sundays are usually pretty idle – my classes don’t start until Tuesday; and ordinarily, everyone else around me is frantically trying to finish Monday’s work. So, I killed a bit of time – I cooked some naan on the stove; I called my mom; I chit-chatted on the interweb.

It was the latter activity that prompted me to take a peekaboo at craigslist.

Although I’ve met great people from craigslist in the past; I never had luck with casual hook-ups. I’d found several nice dates by looking in the regular ‘w4w’ and ‘strictly platonic’  sections, one of which led to some lovely sex. I draw a distinction, though, between these two and the “casual encounters” area. As the name suggests, ‘casual encounters’ is more explicitly sexual and opens a potential space for plain old, NSA fucking that the other two simply don’t*.

Of course, your ability to actually access that space depends heavily on what you’re looking for:

• Are you an average-looking girl wanting  to hook up with a man? Excellent. You have tons of options. So many, in fact, that you have no reason to be on craigslist in the first place °.

• Are you an average-looking gay guy looking to hook up with a man? If you’re mobile and live in an urban area with a reasonably-large gay male community, you have some options.

• Are you an average-looking straight man looking to hook up with a girl? Good luck. You’ll need it, especially if you’re looking online.

• …and if you’re a girl looking for another girl, you may as well just avoid that craigslist bin o’ shit, because most women aren’t nearly as open to casual sex as men are. This sad fact is borne out in the dearth of ads in that section, unless you count the dozens of ads from blatant spammers, straight men pretending to be chicks, and straight chicks who just want to awkwardly jam their tongues into your unexcited orifice while their boyfriend gruntingly beats off to the action in a corner.

It was with this jaded attitude that I sifted through ads that day, expecting ‘lawlz’ and little else ◊ when I clicked on an ad entitled “I need it.”.

…and felt intrigued. A post from a self-described ‘butch-of-center’ person looking for a ‘femme-of-center’ person to fuck. She seemed non-creepy. Straight, and to-the-point. Good grammar ※.

So, I replied with a few photos and a spiel about what I like in bed (being fucked vigorously & well), what I’m not willing to do (any sort of fluid exchange), & other vitals. She e-mailed me back relatively quickly, and we met that night, which made me feel a lot of things, aside from the obvious throbbing in my cunt while watching her strap on her cock & bury it deep inside me.

I’m loathe to be thought of as an anticlimactic tease (and plus, I love to share); so, I’ll write extensively about experience itself in more (graphic) detail later; I’d rather just use this post as a space to rattle on about the gendered perks & pitfalls of internet hookups, and the way this experience shifted my own framework.

*Interesting fact: I’ve noticed that even in the “strictly platonic” m4m section, you still find posts with titles like “suck me dry” and “cock massage, anyone?”, while the lesbian personals will be filled with “wanna be my exercise partner?” or “let’s totally groom our dogs together!”, leaving me to yet again feel like flipping god the bird for not making me a gay man.

°…unless you don’t know any men in meatspace that you’d sleep with, which is the situation I was in for awhile – knowing no men in real life I’d sleep with, but feeling too intimidated by men to hook up with a stranger.

‘Casual encounters’ sections make for some good reading, especially if you search for specific words like “pregnant”, “lactation”, and “smell”.
Yes. I’m a snob.


~ by fistfulofsunshine on April 17, 2009.

2 Responses to “Jackpot.”

  1. such a lucky encounter, really…

  2. oh, and i think i am the dear friend! woo! and woot for that metaphor. phenomenal.

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